Planner Series: Week Five and I’m A Convert

“Seeing as I have an addictive personality, I fully expect [my foray into planning] to snowball into something egregiously offensive, a habit where I have a monthly ‘sticker budget’ and I lock myself in a room for 45 minutes every Sunday to plan out the week ahead. That might seem like overkill to you because you are still a rational being who is not seduced by the very idea of being able to justify buying stickers at the age of 24.”

That’s an excerpt from the very first piece I did on the planner subculture, back when I was a sweet summer child with no knowledge of things like ‘flat lays’ and ‘spread photography’ and ‘high end washi.’ I wrote the above paragraph as a joke, since of course I wasn’t going to do any of those things.

BQqHtcXlnE5.jpgI think this is a flat lay. Maybe? God, I don’t know. Either way, Life is Sweet kit available at Labelled with Love Co, under $10 with code GRACEGETS30

And now I am coming to you from the comfort of my bedroom, the chaos of my new planner life strewn out on my bed behind me, trying not to think too hard about how at one point, $50/month on planner supplies had seemed like such hyperbolic overkill that it was funny.

I have stickers for every occasion: pregnancy tracker stickers, list checkmark stickers, little chilly emoti stickers where the cute cartoon guy is frozen in a block of ice because I live in Maine and it’s frickin cold. I have stickers to track my sticker orders, and other stickers that say ‘NO SPEND’ since I apparently lack the self control to manage my money without the help of a tiny lil Terra.

Don’t even get me started on deco stickers.

BQi-q0RjbDkActually, please do. I love deco stickers. My faves are currently from It’s Paper Dear. Just look at these suckers. February is For Girls deco sheet, $3.30

I even recently dropped the cost of a cocktail on a sticker book, since I’ve reached the point where I need to buy unnecessary stuff to store my  other unnecessary stuff. If that seemed like a weird way of measuring cost, I agree. But it’s the way I rationalize the expenses of this new hobby in my brain, since I haven’t had a drink in nine months and I could really go for a Bloody Mary. Maybe they make stickers for those…?

il_570xN.1046142279_74fp.jpgA quick Etsy search has produced this. Of fucking course they do. God bless. Beverage sticker sheet from PearTeaStickers, $2.75

But the sticker life hasn’t been all fun and games. There have been some moments of intense adrenaline and subsequent crushing disappointment, since a lot of the popular shops like to release limited amounts of stock and cause a sticker feeding frenzy. I admit that there have been some 8 PM’s where I’ve waited with my phone clutched in my sweaty little hand, mouth-breathing heavily as I hit refresh, my dopamine spiking into a critical high as I hastily added the precious, limited stickers to my cart and went to hit pay –

– only for it to read ‘SOLD OUT’ the moment I try to sign into paypal.

woman-laying-in-money-pile.jpgI’m lookin at you, Two Lil Bees. This is how I envision Maria, the owner, as her loyal sycophant followers (of which I am one) passive aggressively congratulate one another in the Facebook group while simultaneously vowing to get that goddamn Oops Grab Bag next time.

Pretty sure the moral of this story is ‘don’t laugh at things that look ridiculous and dumb, because karma will hypnotize you into falling in love with it and you’ll have to eat your words.’ … Or the more simplified version, ‘Don’t be a jerk.’

Either way, I am happy in this quiet, weird world of excessive Instagram giveaways and adhesive backing. It’s true that the Facebook groups are hilariously intense collections of women with severe opinions on everyone else’s planning habits and lifestyle choices. Just last week a girl found a typo in her Erin Condren (fancy fancy) planner that had ‘Passover Begins’ written as ‘Passover Beings’, and her caption of the image was along the lines of ‘I’m a grammar nazi so this bothered me…’ Immediately the comments erupted with people calling her offensive and other nasty things for being so calloused as to use the phrase ‘grammar Nazi’ so closely in junction with a Jewish holiday, and I got to see it all unfold. It was an excellent way to wile away a lunch break. I think I will find a sticker to commemorate it.

But you get a handful of zealots with every hobby, and that’s all part of the fun. And it’s certainly not like I’m above it. Judging by how quickly I fell down into this rabbit hole, I’d say it’s only a matter of months before I’m at rock bottom, calling people ‘sweetie’ and offering trades for scraps of The Planner Society kits.

In the meantime, I’m going to chill atop my bed of vintage floral stickers and cling to what little self-control I have left as I scroll through Labelled with Love Co’s new releases. … Lolol who am I kidding I already ordered two kits.



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