Mythologies all over the world feature strong, terrifying women and goddesses. But all I really know about is Greek mythology, so that’s what we’re going for today. It’s party time.
If you know even the tiniest bit about Greek mythology, you know about Circe. She was basically the first-ever witch, except given the much cooler title of ‘sorceress,’ or just ‘goddess of magic.’
She’s a prominent character in the Odyssey, where there’s this whole Circe-centric rigmarole about turning Odysseus’ men into swine (not a metaphor, literal pigs) and flirting with Odyssues by promising not to chop his twig and berries off during sex. Odysseus and his crew have such a great time on Circe’s weird trippy island that their journey gets delayed by a full year.
People always blame Circe for this delay but, I mean, honestly – do you blame the person who threw the dope party when you get in trouble for breaking your curfew? Or do you admit that you have poor impulse control and didn’t wanna leave until after you’d spent a full extra year drunkenly hanging out with lions who used to be people?
According to Greek myth, Atalanta’s origin story is the classic ‘dad wanted a son, got a daughter instead, so left that daughter on a mountaintop to die.’ Dads, amirite?!
But Atalanta wasn’t about to just die in infancy. Instead, she was found by a literal mama bear who nursed her and raised her until Atalanta was old enough to handle herself. She learned how to fight, hunt, and live like a bear, and basically had an awesome life in the forest as a huntress.
She also vowed her virginity to the goddess Artemis because she didn’t have time for fuck bois of any kind, and when two centaurs tried to forcible break this vow, she just… killed them. I’m not condoning murder, but I mean. Murdering your rapistwould be a rush.
Myrina, a Queen of the Amazons, is less well-known than her fellow queen Hippolyta but no less accomplished. She led successful military expeditions, struck peace treaties, expanded her peoples’ borders, and basically was an all-around revolutionary renegade. She also died in battle alongside many of her fellow Amazons, but that’s still pretty sick – talk about going out in a blaze of glory.
Okay, so Hera may be kind of a bitch, but in her defense, her husband sucks. Like, he sucks. Zeus will not stop cheating on her and lying to her and murdering her favorites and… the list goes on. Hera doesn’t exactly keep her cool about it, frequently exacting very specific revenge plots on the objects of his affections, whether the girls are at fault or not.
All that being said, she’s one of the most powerful goddesses around. I mean, who among us hasn’t chased our husband’s side-piece, who our husband recently turned into a quail, across oceans just to prevent her from giving birth to her bastard twins?!
To be honest, I wouldn’t really wanna hang out with Nemesis since she’s basically the arbiter of justice. Her whole thing is ‘enacting retribution on those who succumb to hubris,’ so I kind of feel like if take too many selfies on a particularly good makeup day, Nemesis would slap my phone out of my hand and tell me I’m not even that cute.
That being said, Nemesis is still pretty awesome since she was both loved and feared by the other gods. She’s usually depicted holding a whip and a dagger so you know she a freak, and I feel like she’s a good one to have on your side. Someone’s wronged you? Go tell your gal pal Nemesis. She’ll knifewhip them until they apologize – and mean it.
image courtesy of johann heinrich schonfeld