You guys, I’m sorry. I’m not great at keeping up with this lately. But it turns out it’s actually incredibly difficult and time-consuming attempting to be a well-rounded human being. I am barely keeping my head above water these days; I’m just treading in place, fighting against the burning in my thighs and trying not to drown.
In the last 72 hours alone, I have managed to:
- Extricate myself from an unhealthy, vampiric relationship with a client who underpaid, overpromised, and refused to let me do my job effectively
- Get into a fight with my mother over something ridiculous and trivial, which is incredibly rare these days and always leaves me feeling unmoored and spent
- Avoid getting into a fight with my father which was a small miracle seeing as he regards everything I do with a sort of muted, pervasive disappointment if not flat out disinterest
- Get a new dog, who is super amazing
- Cry a lot
- Pretend like I haven’t been crying when Orie walks in to check on me
- Fail and cry some more
- Secure Fastpasses for the November Disney trip that we’re taking with my mom, who I’m currently fighting with
- Finish a book
- Regret buying Franzia after one glass because of course I regret it, it’s fucking Franzia
- Jog a lot
- Glare at the stubborn flab on my belly that seems content to stay post-baby #2
- Glare at the stubborn flab that is baby #2 as he insists upon waking me up twice a night
- Decide after 2 more glasses that Franzia isn’t so bad and hey, things seem a lot softer and rosier now
- Watch Lucy play outside with the dog and remember being 4 when everything was lovely and sunny and fight back the urge to cry again.
Franzia is my family.
So basically, I’m in a weird place right now. And I can’t even whine at Jessica to pick up my slack and post instead of me, since she’s still dealing with the fallout from Hurricane Irma.
What are yalls suggestions for being less of a suck? I could definitely use them.